Friday, October 10, 2008
Did You Survive an Abortion?
How many abortion survivors do you know? I have a dear friend who went to a clinic as a teenager to find out if she was pregnant. When she learned her test was positive, she was told she could have an abortion if she didn't want to tell her family she was pregnant. My friend decided to schedule the abortion and was told not to tell anyone because they would try to convince her to keep the baby. Because she was very nervous about the procedure, she told another friend who told her mother of the plans. Her mother talked her out of having the abortion.
My friend now has an adult son whom she loves very much and counts him as one of the biggest blessings in her life! She had been told to abort this wonderful Christian man by someone who didn't know her, her family or her situation. I would qualify that child as one who survived an abortion. Even though the surgical procedure was never performed, he survived the easy availability for his mother to abort him.
I only know about my friend's situation because she has supported my speaking out about the lies Planned Parenthood and Pro-Choice supporters speak in the name of "Freedom of Choice" for women. You might have a very close friend or even a family member who is alive today because their mother decided to proceed with the choice of birth. They may not even know their mother contemplated abortion at all.
Do some choices have bigger consequences than others? Absolutely! If I decide to take home a pencil from my office, I might get a reprimand and a lecture from H.R. about ethics. If I decide to have unprotected sex with someone, I might get pregnant. Is the choice to carry that baby to birth a punishment?
I have recently known two teenage girls who had sexual relationships with their boyfriends and got pregnant. One decided to publicly announce her mistake, ask for forgiveness and decided to carry the baby to term and adopt her to a family unable to have a child. The second girl decided to move away for the duration of the pregnancy but still carried the baby to term and adopted her to a family. I think the most unselfish decision a young mother can make is when she considers another family to raise the child and gives them that gift. Especially when that family is physically unable to bear a child of their own.
I told the teenage mother I was very impressed by her maturity to make a decision in the best interest of another family and the baby. Since we were living in California at the time, it would have been convenient to take the "easy way out" and have an abortion before anyone knew she was pregnant. Girls at any age can acquire an abortion without parental consent in the following states: Alaska, California, Connecticut, Washington D.C., Hawaii, Montana, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, Vermont, Washington.
Regardless of reason or rationale, every abortion is birth control.
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I believe there are many American voters who aren't yet aware how many abortions are performed each year. According to Abort 73 there were 1.21 million abortions performed in 2005 (the latest year for info). That makes it very difficult for me to understand the pro-choice stance that abortion is not used as birth control. Especially when 88% of abortions are performed before the 12th week, when genetic testing would be performed to determine the "health" of the fetus.
I have two friends who are adopted, as well as two cousins. My friends are so dear to me, I don't even want to think about what my life would be like without them. I'm so thankful that their parents decided to give the most precious and loving gift of adoption instead of cutting their little lives short.
Thank you for continuing to tell the stories about abortion that the media and planned parenthood don't want told.
I think it's ridiculous that you can't give a teen vaccinations (or probably any other medical procedure) without parental consent, but they can have an abortion without notifying the parents. That just doesn't even make sense.
I know. It's incredibly surprising how out of hand abortion on demand has become and all in the name of "freedom of choice". How about the choice not to get yourself in a situation where you might become pregnant?
It is the responsibility of parents to educate their children about the consequences of sexual activity including STD's. While it is true that becoming pregnant from one sexual encounter is very rare, it is a possibility and everyone knows it.
Abortion was leagalized the year I was born. Even though my mother was 16 years old, she carried me to term. My birth mother and father did not believe abortion was right, but also knew they couldn't keep me being so young, so they gave me up for adoption. I am thankful my mother didn't choose to abort me and that my parents did a very unselfish thing.
Thanks for your blog post about this sensitive issue.
Kathleen
Kathleen,
Thanks for leaving your comment. Your birth mother made a huge sacrifice to choose to carry you and I applaud her decision to do so. She also must have been mature enough to realize she could not care for a baby, being a child in the legal sense herself. At 16, I imagine she would have received quite a bit of negative attention.
There are many things the Church can and must do to combat the option of abortion for teenage pregnancy. Christians need to stop looking down our noses on teenage pregnancy. As hard as it is to believe, there are Christian parents who pressure their daughters to have abortions simply because of the perceived stigma attached to having a pregnant teen.
Early education by parents at home is the best way to prevent teenage pregnancy and when a teen mother finds out she is pregnant is not the time to lecture her on abstinence. We must come alongside mothers and offer support and options to encourage her to carry her baby to term. One such example could be giving the mother somewhere to stay because her parents may not be able to forgive the mistake that led their daughter to pregnancy.
I can't help but think of children who were adopted and don't know the parents that raised them are not their birth parents. They have no idea how close they came to ending up an abortion statistic. I think this probably applies to some pro-choice advocates too.
I think it's important to know that it's the behavior of having sex outside of marriage that is the sin in God's eyes, not the resulting pregnancy. This is a huge difference. You're right that we should lighten the harsh judgment attached to the unplanned pregnancy. This is what scared me away from wanting to have the baby I was carrying outside of marriage.
I'm just glad I had a friend who loved me and my unborn baby enough to tell my family I was pregnant. The news was out and there was no reason not to have the baby. I was more afraid of the judgment than the responsibility. Very sad for me and potentially deadly for my child.
Laurie, thank you so much for sharing your story. I admire your willingness to talk with other girls in the same situation about their options.
I think you are right, the thought of ridicule for the girl (and her family) drive many young women, both Christian and non-Christian, to seek guidance. Unfortunately, that council is most readily available from pro-choice organizations like Planned Parenthood who push the idea of an "easy" abortion very hard.
Christians need to support and promote other options for unwed pregnant girls like Crisis Pregnancy Centers if we really want to change the tide of abortion on demand.
But above all, we must pray.
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